Thursday, February 7, 2013

Our Love Story, Part 2

Part 1 here

One Saturday morning I lay on my cousin’s upper bunk bed in Monticello Apartments. “So who is this Ben Dilsaver?” Kristen asked.
 “Oh just a little crush. I so wish he would ask me out! What about this Kevin?”
“We met at a dance. Wouldn’t it be so fun if he called me right now??” (and he did!)

I had to wait a little longer for mine. “A date! He asked me on a date!” I squealed to my roommates. I was ecstatic. The guy I liked actually liked me. And what a date it was! He and Brandon made Haley and I French toast for breakfast, then took us up to Midway for some tire rolling, paper boat racing, and off-roading in Brandon’s jimmy. If I recall correctly Haley even took a turn driving. I feared for my life! We drove back home in a hurry since I had another date that afternoon! (A fact Ben will never let me live down)

Late November we went out to Kneader’s for breakfast just the two of us. We talked. I never tired of listening to him. Of his easy-going, even-keeled manner. He thought I was funny. He thought I was smart. And I thought the world of him.

My roommate Marissa was planning an extravagant murder mystery dinner. I was to be Poker Alice, and I needed an ex-husband. “Who are you asking Ashley?” Marissa poked me and gave me a wild, I-know-who look.
“Do you really not know?” I smiled, “How is Ted coming along?” I shot back.

Ben did come as my date and he dressed the part. I confess I went a little weak-kneed when he showed up in pearl-snap buttons and a cowboy hat. Here was my dream come true: my cowboy come to whisk me away.

Another date he took me to the Planetarium in Salt Lake. Surely, I thought, he’s going to try and hold my hand. But he didn’t. We did, however, have a wonderful time watching a 3D movie of space and exploring Mars together afterward. I trilled just being close to him.

Things were moving too slowly, people told me. “Drop him,” my roommates said. But I couldn’t give up. He was so great. And he liked country music.

Right before Christmas he gave me a present: a scarf. I thought it an odd color, but it was the thought that counts. I was embarrassed I hadn’t gotten him anything! I admit the thought had crossed my mind, but at the risk of looking too forward I had decided against it. Now, as an act of retribution, I got him a Brad Paisley CD, a mutual country artist love. Although he gave me a little trouble for purchasing it after the fact, it was well received. 

Over Christmas break I went on a long drive to Washington with my brother Justin and his family. He was having too much fun with this little love interest of mine. “Who are you going to kiss on New Years Eve?” he texted Ben from his mysterious number. “Who wants to know?” Ben asked. “An inquiring mind,” was Justin's reply.

I got back from break a little early to get back to work before the semester started. That meant every evening I had free. As fate would have it, Ben had also arrived back to school early. “What are you up to tonight?” He texted me. “Something with you, I hope,” I replied.

We hadn’t broken the touch barrier. I sought my coworkers for advice. “Listen Ashley. You HAVE to cuddle with him while you’re watching a movie. Otherwise he’ll never know that you like him more than a friend!” Cara demanded.
“I don’t know if I can do it!” I breathed.
“You can thank me when you’re married.”
That night we watched Pure Country at my apartment and, emboldened by Cara’s advice, I sat so close to him on the couch that our arm hairs touched. I was so nervous about being rejected. What if we really were just friends? What then? But little did I know Ben was taking it slow. He was being overly cautious, trying not to make a wrong move because he wanted our relationship to become something special. When he saw me scoot in closer he seized the opportunity and, casually, put his arm around me.

Another night we watched Signs at his apartment. I placed my hand in easy reach on my knee, just in case. He reached for my hand. This amazing feeling swept over me. Like his hand literally fit with mine. The same hands that would hold our children, and reach for mine for comfort for many years to come.

We started to hold hands in public. Was I his girlfriend? School began again. He came over every night. Monday was a holiday, Martin Luther King Day. We decided to go to the Freedom March and speech afterwards up on campus. It was cold. The candles with their paper holders flickered in the wind. He reached for my hand.

He took me home as usual. He took my hands in his to warm them up. We sat smiling at each other at the table. “Let’s make this thing official,” he said, “Can I kiss you?”

Continued here


  1. This is so fun to read since we missed hearing Ben's side of the story, already having moved to Texas. Glad you didn't give up on him! We're so happy for you guys!

  2. I love that this is written in the same style as the Boyfriend Trouble saga. I'm just waiting for the line: And then she dropped her cake. Ha!

  3. Nice blog posts, Ashley. That's a good idea to document your love story online. Fun to read it!