Tulips on the Table

As my kids get older, I'm less and less interested in everyone on the internet having access to every picture of my kids I have ever taken. Cheyenne googled her name the other day and this blog was a top hit. Some kids can be so mean these days, and all you need is one bad picture of somebody to make their life miserable. So to imagine a bully having all these pictures so easily accessed is not something I want for the future.

I tried keeping a 'private' blog and a 'public' blog, but it's so much work doing both. This blog IS my picture storage and organization, so to do something different after all these years would be a major undertaking. So after much deliberation I've decided to make my blog private indefinitely.

If you'd like to keep reading, please send me your email address so I can give you access! You can either leave it in a comment or email me directly ashley(dot)dilsaver(at)gmail(dot)com

Please don't feel embarrassed to ask for access! I read strangers blogs, friends-I-don't-know-very-well's blogs, people-I-haven't-talked-to-in-years' blogs, so it would not weird me out at all if you asked for access to keep reading!

If something I have written is helpful to you (or you think would be helpful to someone else), it is always ok with me if you wanted to share that with others, regardless of the fact that my blog is private.

Alternatively, I will keep posting the text of my 'short' blogs on Instagram (you can ask to be my friend there, too!) and my blog's Facebook page, as well as occasional update photos in those places as well, so if you are an occasional reader you won't miss much!

I will make my blog private on August 1st. So please let me know your email by then!

I've added a follow by email button at the bottom of my blog if that is a convenient way for you to find out when I've posted.

I wanted to share a little bit about the last days of Jesus' life and some of the things I learned.

A book Cheyenne had to write for school. It was so darling I wanted to remember it always. And she described our family at this stage pretty accurately too!

So this has been a crazy season in my life. Having five kids has been totally overwhelming me.
*sidenote. I hate writing posts like this because I am so richly blessed. There are SO many people that have it worse off than me. It's hard to imagine someone complaining who has five beautiful kids, a loving husband, a house for their family, running water, all the things. I know so many who suffer in major, life-changing ways. But I need to record these feelings, and these are the experiences that have been given to me.

Back in May I went for a walk in my favorite park at the height of spring. We live in a small(ish) town, and sometimes I have the park to myself. The blossoms danced prettily in the gusts of wind, the sun played peek-a-boo with the petals as I snapped picture after picture, trying to capture this beautiful, beautiful world and the euphoria I felt. I'm pretty sure it will be spring in heaven.